They carry our folders, they frequently suffer faulty-water-bottle-induced floods, and above all they transport any and all important pieces of work/stationary to some far away, inaccessible parallel vortex - never to be seen again. You guessed it - backpacks. As the fashion landmark for all secondary school years, it would be unjust to spare the Godolphin community the joy of an Unpublished article on the subject. And, because Unpublished is all about indomitable journalistic duress (and definitely not about unfiltered judgement...), we feel it necessary to render this article an opportunity to observe and assess the backpack-wearers of our school community. Please find below a carefully curated small collection of bags and their humble ratings. Hope you enjoy!
1. The EastpakTM = 8/10
A timeless classic. Although many Eastpak-wearers have bravely attempted to fend off the accusations that they are ‘basic’ and even ‘boring’, there may be more truth in these allegations than they like to admit. The idea that Eastpaks are simply the bag version of North Face puffer jackets is one that the Godolphin audience simply cannot try to deny - particularly as an emerging fashion conundrum begins to arise: what colour Eastpak should be purchased in order to create a sufficiently complementary harmony with a coloured North Face puffer jacket? Ah, the struggles of West London private school girls. Furthermore, the somewhat hunchback-figure induced by the shape of this backpack does bump its rating down a tad - but it cannot be overstated that, laid bare, the Eastpak is practical and pragmatic. Something which cannot be said of some other back apparel...
2. The Fjällräven Kånken = 4/10
Right. Just typing the name of this infamous staple took far too long, what with its copious amounts of accents. The Kånken is a landmark trend which befalls all roughly around the years of Year 7/8 - I distinctly remember ditching my boring grey Eastpak for the infinitely cooler, highlighter-stained Kånken, lying discarded in the back of my sister’s wardrobe. I have now returned to the safety of the Eastpak. Although loving memories of these years does soften my view on this particular backpack, there’s no way to avoid the obvious facts. Number 1: Despite the small red inside label, these backpacks WERE NOT built to “relieve Swedish childrens’ back pain”. My shoulders will forever be ingrained with angry, red rope burn from those impossibly thin straps. Evidently this feature only works on Swedish children. Number 2: It’s not big enough. It’s not. Don’t even try it. I spent almost 3 years carrying half my books around in my hands because the small cardboard box of a backpack I had was too thin to perform its duty properly! The trauma-induced angst is still there. And no, I did not look ultra-academic and Rory Gilmore-esque with my folders in my arms, but instead managed to achieve the I’m-late-for-class-and-all-my-folders-are-falling bedraggled look instead. Would not recommend. However, the colour and design are cute.
3. Canvas/Tote Bags = 6/10
Mixed feelings about this one. On the one hand, the indisputable elevation this bag offers above normal double-strap-bag-wearers is definitely a plus. Being able to breeze through the Godolphin corridors, navigating in and out of the traffic whilst your backpack friends are stuck blundering and shoving their way through - the canvas bag definitely provides a desirable sense of nonchalant elegance. However, if we leave the artsy and aesthetic pros of this apparel choice to one side, there remains a slight problem: shoulder pain. Oh yes. You best believe that after an entire school day of lugging around folders, textbooks, novels, pencil cases, water bottles, etc, that singular shoulder will be rubbed raw. Alas, we reach the ultimate dichotomy: the coexistence of fashion and pain.
4. Smiggle Bags = 3/10
Ok, so I am using the brand ‘Smiggle’ here as a blanket term for any and all round-shaped backpacks with colourful patterns/designs. Honestly, I have a huge amount of respect for these bag-wearers. The ability to bring in that magnitude of colour and joy on a grey Monday morning each week for the entire school year is formidable. However, a disappointing trend seems to have struck this community. Regrettably, the initial numbers of tens of thousands of Goldophiners sporting the unmistakable splashes of colour and shapes has suffered a decrease, particularly noticeable as they climb up the year-group ladder. Unfortunately, the overload of patterns, colours and textures is simply too much for my feeble, coffee-dulled senses, and therefore my reaction to seeing one of these vibrant bags is akin to a sensory assault.
SPECIAL MENTION: Backpack-Luggage Hybrid = 10/10.
Encompasses style, luxury and efficiency all in one. No further comment needed.
Thus terminates my investigation into a few of Godolphin’s most sought-after backpacks. Hope you enjoyed!
The Unpublished Team Xoxo
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